Today, I thought.
I know- major accomplishment, right?
I thought I wouldn’t set my alarm clock.
I thought it might be a mundane day. The office was closed and I was more or less alone (Which, for an extravert like myself, leads to terrifying thoughts of potential introspective time.)
I thought with my brother about people we’ve loved but who have passed away.
I thought I’d make another cup of coffee.
I thought about what makes schools sustainable with Jane.
I thought about that for awhile.
I thought about cleaning the dishes.
Then I thought about schools some more. What is it that makes them sustainable? Motivation? Leadership? Capacity? Chance? Environment? Risk?
I thought about why people risk.
I thought about what it means to be brave.
I thought about what it means to count (and not in reference to numbers).
I thought about what my life would look like if I had to turn in a receipt for it.
So far, I’ve been given 23 years to “buy things” with.
I thought about what I’ve bought. And I thought about what someone could buy with their time.
Entertainment. Comfort. Vanity. Compassion. Humility. Sacrifice. Love.
I thought if you were looking to buy a car you wouldn’t go to the grocery store.
I thought that if I wanted to buy peace, joy, purpose, or meaning- I probably wouldn’t go to stores like, “LOTS O STUFF,” “World of Apathy,” “Me-mart,” or “Comfort Depot.”
Which, I think, means that I would go to stores like, “Yourenotthe Centre,” “BIG LOVES,” “Belief, Brave, and Beyond,” and ”Joy-Fil-A.”
I think we owe it to those people who are fighting tooth and nail for more time. I think we owe it to ourselves. I think it’d be a terrible waste of the most precious thing you have to come up with anything less than a DARN good receipt for every moment you’ve been given.
I think we need to ask ourselves where we’re shopping, what is on our receipt, and what it is we want to buy with the time we have.
Keep thinking. Life is what we make of it !!!
You are blessed to be a thinker. Many in our culture go through life filling their time with ‘senseless’ musing. Some dont figure out until late in life what you summed up in your example of where we are ‘spending’ our lives. I particularly enjoyed the contrast of “Lots O Stuff” and “Me-Mart” to “Yourenotthe Centre,” and “Belief, Brave, and Beyond, Thank you for so capably articulating the blessing of selflessness. We enjoy reading your blog.
Caroline, you are such a gifted writer and God has given you insight well beyond your years. You are truly making every moment count and having such an impact on so many. What would our world be like if we all thought more about the “purchases” we made with our time? Praying for you and your work. So excited to see all God is doing through you.
You my love, continually make me think! Something, I tend to do so little of. I go through life doing the same things the same way.. but what if? What if I stopped to realize what I have and stop complaining about what’s missing.. What if I got down on Gracie’s level instead of hovering above her? What if I took what God gave me and truly figured out how to use it? What if I loved more, longer, harder? What if I forgave quicker, complained less, and just took the time to appreciate life more… I promise to do more thinking. I promise to do all the what if’s. I love you more than ever, miss you harder and will always appreciate your life and your devotion to serve.